The Uninvited

In the suspense thriller The Uninvited, Anna (Emily Browning) returns home after spending time in a psychiatric facility following her mother's tragic death and discovers that her mother's former nurse, Rachel (Elizabeth Banks), has moved into their house and become engaged to her father, Steven (David Strathairn). Soon after she learns this shocking news, Anna is visited by her mother's ghost, who warns her that Rachel has evil intentions. Together, Anna and her sister (Arielle Kebbel) must convince their father that his new fiancee is not who she pretends to be, and what should have been a happy family reunion becomes a lethal battle of wills between stepdaughters and stepmother.

Can we please stop with the Japanese remakes of PG-13 horror movies? The zone is so beyond flooded with them. And for the love of God - if you are going to make a "horror" movie . . . . make it rated R!!! Anywho, this movie could have actually been somewhat decent if they decided what kind of a movie they wanted to make. Without going to much in to spoiler territory, this movie is part Hand That Rocks The Cradle, part Sixth Sense, and then part Grudge/Ring. It would have been a fine movie if they wanted Elizabeth Banks to play the crazy lady moving in on the family. It would have been fine if the main girl ended up in a Sixth Sense type situation. It would have been fine if the freaky images that the main girl saw a la The Grudge/The Ring guided her to the end. However, the fact that they tried to mash all three together made this movie utterly absurd. I was even okay with the Hand That Rocks The Cradle/Sixth Sense combo. It was the creepy/freaky images portion of this movie that left you staring at the screen with a "What the hell" face on when the credits started rolling. Side note . . . . . nothing says getting back at your future stepmother that you suspect of killing your mom like taking the batteries out of her vibrator. That's like Revenge 101.

I wouldn't really recommend this movie to anyone. Its really not worth it . . . . .even for the "horror" junkies.

Underworld: Rise Of The Lycans

Underworld: Rise of the Lycans delves into the origins of the centuries-old blood feud between the aristocratic vampires, known as Death Dealers, and the barbaric Lycans (werewolves). A young Lycan, Lucian (Michael Sheen), emerges as a powerful leader who rallies the werewolves to rise up against Viktor (Bill Nighy), the cruel vampire king who has persecuted them for hundreds of years. Lucian is joined by his secret lover, the beautiful vampire Sonja (Rhona Mitra), in his battle to free the Lycans from their brutal enslavement.

This movie was essentially and hour and 1/2 extension of what was a 2 minute flashback in the previous Underworld installment. This movie is beyond uneccesary and pointless. I actually really liked the original Underworld and thought the sequel was watchable but like I said - I got the feud between the Death Dealers and Lycans with the brief narrated flashback. This movie didn't really provide me with any further insight in to their feud and was just an excuse to take our money. On a side note - what the hell is Michael Sheen thinking by going back to this role? Since Underworld: Evolution he has played Tony Blair in The Queen and David Frost in Frost/Nixon. He was great in both of them and has managed to put himself on the cusp of oscar recognition only to return to playing the leader of the Lycans? Someone needs a new agent.

I wouldn't recommend anyone checking this movie out. Its pointless, uneccesary and full of schlocky gore. Its a blatant waste of time.

Notorious

Notorious is about the life of rapper Christopher Wallace a.k.a. The Notorious B.I.G. In just a few short years, The Notorious B.I.G. rose from the streets of Brooklyn to become one of the most influential hip hop artists of all time. B.I.G. was a gifted storyteller; his narratives about violent life on the streets were told with a gritty, objective realism that won him enormous respect and credibility. His stories were universal and gave a voice to his generation.

This was an interesting watch for me having lived through all this stupid drama involving east coast vs west coast and remembering everyone talking about all this stuff. Outside of that part of watching it - this was a pretty crappy movie. It was totally overdramatized and sappy at the end. It also took waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too long to get to the parts that everyone wanted to watch. There was no reason for this movie to be two hours long.

I wouldn't really recommend anyone rushing to check this out in theaters. It would probably make a better rental.

Hotel For Dogs

Hotel for Dogs stars Emma Roberts, Jake T. Austin, Lisa Kudrow, Kevin Dillon and Don Cheadle in a smart, funny comedy adventure that shows how far love and imagination can take you. When their new guardians forbid 16-year old Andi (Roberts) and her younger brother, Bruce (Austin) to have a pet, Andi has to use her quick wit to help find a new home for their dog, Friday. The resourceful kids stumble upon an abandoned hotel and using Bruce's talents as a mechanical genius, transform it into a magical dog-paradise for Friday – and eventually for all Friday's friends. When barking dogs make the neighbors suspicious, Andi and Bruce use every invention they have to avoid anyone discovering who let the dogs in.

I am an admitted movie addict. The rule basically is that if I see the preview for it - I have to see the movie. God bless Stinka because if it wasn't for her I don't know how I would justify seeing this Nickelodean movies. What am I going to do in a couple of years? Anywho, this is your textbook family movie with kids and animals in it. The dogs are cute and funny. The kids have to stick together through the rough times and there is the inevitable happy ending. If you have kids - take them to see this. If you don't - run for the hills.

I wouldn't remotely recommend this movie to anyone with the kiddies. The kiddies will love this movie though. Stinka gave it a huge thumbs up.

Paul Blart: Mall Cop

Kevin James stars as the title character, a single, suburban dad, trying to make ends meet as a security officer at a New Jersey mall. Though no one else takes his job seriously, Paul considers himself on the front lines of safety. When a heist shuts down the megaplex, Jersey's most formidable mall cop will have to become a real cop to save the day.

I am a huge fan of Kevin James. I have been since his old stand up routines. I watch The King Of Queens regularly in syndication. I have been told by friends, family and random strangers that I remind them of him. I'd like to think its because of my personality and not my size, but I digress. I have an ability to find him funny no matter what. This movie is a shining example of that. The movie sucked. It was silly, pointless and stupid. If anyone other than Kevin James was in this I would have bailed after my 20 minutes of patience was tapped. However, I enjoyed it solely because of him and how silly he is. He truly seems to capture that stupidness that we all do when we are alone or in our heads and isn't afraid to put it out there no matter how stupid he will look.

I would only recommend this movie to people that find Kevin James as funny as I do. The movie itself is totally garbage, but if you want to laugh at The King Of Queens go check it out.

My Bloody Valentine 3D

Ten years ago, a tragedy changed the town of Harmony forever. Tom Hanniger, an inexperienced coal miner, caused an accident in the tunnels that trapped and killed five men and sent the only survivor, Harry Warden, into a permanent coma. But Harry Warden wanted revenge. Exactly one year later, on Valentine's Day, he woke up...and brutally murdered twenty-two people with a pickaxe before being killed.Ten years later, Tom Hanniger returns to Harmony on Valentine's Day, still haunted by the deaths he caused. Struggling to make amends with his past, he grapples with unresolved feelings for his ex-girlfriend, Sarah, who is now married to his best friend, Axel, the town sheriff. But tonight, after years of peace, something from Harmony's dark past has returned. Wearing a miner's mask and armed with a pickaxe, an unstoppable killer is on the loose. And as his footsteps come ever closer, Tom, Sarah and Axel realize in terror that it just might be Harry Warden who's come back to claim them...

This is a total throwback to the 70s/80s horror movie. There is horrid acting. The story is beyond weak. The gore is excessive and so over the top. The movie ends up being hysterically funny even though you are watching people get slaughtered. You can't help but laugh your ass off at how absurd what you are seeing on screen is. The 3D effects make you laugh even harder.

I would recommend people checking this out because it is "fun" at the movies. It is by no means a good movie. Its actually quite a horrible movie. But its "fun" and if you get the chance to see it in 3D that makes it even better.

Not Easily Broken

Not Easily Broken is an drama about love and family adapted from the book of the same name by renowned pastor and author Bishop T. D. Jakes.

I barely made it 20 minutes in to this movie. This is nothing more than a Tyler Perry knock off with a lot of over dramatic characters and waa waa about relationships. Even though I've reached a point where I'm getting tired of the constant flow of TPs, this movie made me remember how good their quality is at least. It was downright painful just watching that small portion of the movie.

I wouldn't recommend this to anyone. Just wait like a month and there will be a new Tyler Perry movie out if these kinds of character dramas are up your alley.

Bride Wars

Liv (Kate Hudson) and Emma (Anne Hathaway) are best friends who since childhood have planned every detail of their respective weddings. At the top of their bridal "must have" list: a ceremony at New York's ultimate bridal destination, the Plaza Hotel. Now, at age 26, they're both about to get married; they're about to realize their dreams; and they're about to live happily ever after. Or maybe not... When a clerical error causes a clash in wedding dates - they're now to be married on the same date! - Liv, Emma and their lifelong friendship are put to the ultimate test. Liv, a successful lawyer who is used to getting what she wants, including the perfect job and the perfect man, won't settle for anything less than the perfect wedding she has dreamed of for years. Emma, a schoolteacher who has always been good at taking care of others, but not so much in looking after herself, discovers her inner Bridezilla and comes out swinging when her own dream wedding is imperiled. Now, the two best friends who'd do anything for each other, find themselves in a no-holds-barred, take-no-prisoners struggle that threatens to erupt into all-out war.

Once again . . . . . I have a problem. That problem also includes seeing most chick flicks. I won't do Sex & The City or movies about traveling pants, but the funny trailered chick flicks fall in line with my movie going illness. This is your textbook chick flick. Its also pretty much everything that you saw in the trailer but longer. The movie really is completely silly and dumb, but there are some pretty big laughs spread throughout that make it somewhat watchable.

I wouldn't recommend anyone rushing out to see this because its not that funny, but the laughs do make it somewhat worthwhile if this is up your alley.

The Unborn

Casey Beldon (Odette Yustman) hated her mother for leaving her as a child. But when inexplicable things start to happen, Casey begins to understand why she left. Plagued by merciless dreams and a tortured ghost that haunts her waking hours, she must turn to the only spiritual advisor, Sendak (Gary Oldman), who can make it stop.With Sendak's help, Casey uncovers the source of a family curse dating back to Nazi Germany—a creature with the ability to inhabit anyone or anything that is getting stronger with each possession. With the curse unleashed, her only chance at survival is to shut a doorway from beyond our world that has been pried open by someone who was never born.

This is another one of those PG-13 horror movies that rests its head on random but incredibly creepy visuals to carry the movie. Its in the same pool as The Grudge, The Ring, etc. and has the same "Huh?" story. The visuals in this one were pretty high on the creepy scale compared to other movies like this to come out recently, but it wasn't near the expectations that were set by the kick ass trailer for this movie.

I'd lukewarmly recommend this movie. I wasn't that in to it but WW (the most avid of scary movie fans) enjoyed it so I'm sure other fright fest fans will enjoy it as well.

Taken

Liam Neeson stars in Taken. When his estranged daughter is kidnapped in Paris, a former spy (Neeson) sets out to find her at any cost. Relying on his special skills, he tracks down the ruthless gang that abducted her and launches a one-man war to bring them to justice and rescue his daughter.

I am absolutely shocked at how much I enjoyed this movie. I saw the trailer and thought it looked like a decent watch but never expected to be sitting on the edge of my seat as much as this movie made me do. I also never thought that Liam Neeson would be remotely buyable as a bad ass able to track his daughter down like that. This movie had action like the Bourne movies and totally sucked you in to the suspense. Its also got a nice, tight running time with helps with the quick, no bs pacing on the movie.

I'd recommend everyone check this movie out. Its coming out at that time of year where the movies are either oscar candidates or pieces of garbage. This movie is actually a pretty good breath of fresh air.

The Reader

The Reader opens in post-WWII Germany when teenager Michael Berg becomes ill and is helped home by Hanna, a stranger twice his age. Michael recovers from scarlet fever and seeks out Hanna to thank her. The two are quickly drawn into a passionate but secretive affair. Michael discovers that Hanna loves being read to and their physical relationship deepens. Hanna is enthralled as Michael reads to her from "The Odyssey," "Huck Finn," and "The Lady with the Little Dog." Despite their intense bond, Hanna mysteriously disappears one day and Michael is left confused and heartbroken. Eight years later, while Michael is a law student observing the Nazi war crime trials, he is stunned to find Hanna back in his life – this time as a defendant in the courtroom. As Hanna's past is revealed, Michael uncovers a deep secret that will impact both of their lives.

Every year there is that movie that comes out that you know is a very well done movie, you know that it was made for award consideration and will probably get it, but you just don't really care for it or about it at all. This is that movie this year. Essentially, it was Kate Winslett having sex with a 16 year old for the first hour with him occasionally reading to her. The second hour was her on trial for Nazi war crimes and the guy being devastated by it . . . . . but still choosing to send tapes of him reading to her. I could see people finding artistic enjoyment in this movie, but personally, I didn't.

I wouldn't really recommend people checking this out. With all of the amazing movies that are presently out there for award consideration - this is definitely the worst one and can pretty much wait for rental.

Marley & Me

As the snow falls on their wedding night, newlyweds John and Jenny Grogan (Owen Wilson and Jennifer Aniston) decide to leave behind the harsh winters of Michigan and head south to begin their new lives in West Palm Beach, Florida. They obtain jobs as journalists, buy their first home, and begin to make their way through the challenges of a new marriage, new careers and, possibly, the life-changing decision to start a family. Unsure of his preparedness for raising children, John confesses his fears to his friend and fellow journalist Sebastian, who comes up with the perfect solution: John should get Jenny a puppy. Then came Marley.The Grogans adopt the cute, twelve pound yellow Labrador, who in no time at all, grows into a 100-pound steamroller of unbridled energy that turns the Grogan home into a disaster area. He flunks obedience school, chews off dry-wall, takes a bite out of the sofa, overturns garbage cans, steals a Thanksgiving turkey, consumes pillows and flowers, drinks toilet water, and chases the UPS guy. Amidst the mayhem he generates through the years, Marley sees the Grogans through the ups and downs of family life, through job and home changes, and most of all, through the myriad challenges of a growing family. As John and Jenny come to realize, Marley - "the world's worst dog" - somehow brings out the best in them.

I put off reviewing this movie for 4 days now because I didn't want to get all choked up again. I really don't care about spoiling this one because I really think that it NEEDS to be spoiled because nobody should walk blindly in to an oncoming mack truck. SPOILER ALERT - Marley dies. I knew this going in and the movie was still devastating. I can only imagine families going to see this and having no clue. That would have to blow Bambi's mother dying right out of the water. Not only does the dog die, but the goodbyes take about 20 minutes and if you don't get teared up (or openly cry like I did - I am man enough to admit this!) you do not have a heart in your chest. This movie is an absolute must see for any pet lovers. I have a cat that I consider to be like my son and I never thought I could love him more than I already did but this movie actually made that happen. All I wanted to do was race home after it was over and chill out with the J man. Putting animal loving aside, the movie was a great heartwarming story of how families grow. The only knock I can make against it is that I could have done without the extra 20 minutes of career angst with Owen Wilson. I found myself really not caring at all whether he should be a reporter or a columnist and shaving that out would have brought this movie down to the perfect running time of an hour and 40 minutes instead of the two hours.

I strongly recommend that everyone check this movie out. Especially if you are a pet lover. Just know that its going to put your heart in a vice and crush it and make sure the kids know beforehand. I took Stinka and two of her friends and they were fine since I told them. However, I still had quivering lip/ugly face cry going on even though I did.

Doubt

It's 1964, St. Nicholas in the Bronx. A vibrant, charismatic priest, Father Flynn (Philip Seymour Hoffman), is trying to upend the schools' strict customs, which have long been fiercely guarded by Sister Aloysius Beauvier (Meryl Streep), the iron-gloved Principal who believes in the power of fear and discipline. The winds of political change are sweeping through the community, and indeed, the school has just accepted its first black student, Donald Miller. But when Sister James (Amy Adams), a hopeful innocent, shares with Sister Aloysius her guilt-inducing suspicion that Father Flynn is paying too much personal attention to Donald, Sister Aloysius sets off on a personal crusade to unearth the truth and to expunge Flynn from the school. Now, without a shard of proof besides her moral certainty, Sister Aloysius locks into a battle of wills with Father Flynn which threatens to tear apart the community with irrevocable consequence.

This was some of the most top notch acting I've ever seen. Phillip Seymour Hoffman was awesome as always as the younger priest who wants to update some old school customs. Amy Adams was great as the nervous new nun under a very strict rule. Meryl Streep was phenomenal as the strict principal of the school. She really took me right back to my grammar catholic school days. I saw Sister Helen Edward right up there on the screen. All three of them seem like locks to be nominated for oscars in my eyes and you might as well engrave Meryl Streep's name on the one for Best Actress.

I strongly recommend that everyone check out this movie. It could serve as a textbook for excellence in acting.

Defiance

Based on an extraordinary true story, Defiance is a tale of family, honor, vengeance and salvation in World War II. The year is 1941 and the Jews of Eastern Europe are being massacred by the thousands. Managing to escape certain death, three brothers take refuge in the dense surrounding woods they have known since childhood. There they begin their desperate battle against the Nazis. Daniel Craig, Liev Schreiber and Jamie Bell star as brothers who turn a primitive struggle to survive into something far more consequential – a way to avenge the deaths of their loved ones by saving thousands of others. At first it is all they can do to stay alive. But gradually, as whispers of their daring spreads, they begin to attract others – men and women, young and old – willing to risk everything for the sake of even a moment's freedom. Tuvia (Craig) is a reluctant leader and his decisions are challenged by his brother, Zus (Schreiber) who worries that Tuvia's idealistic plans will doom them all. Asael (Bell) is the youngest – caught between his brothers' fierce rivalry. As a brutal winter descends, they work to create a community, and to keep faith alive when all humanity appeared to be lost.

I really liked this movie. I kind of expected it to be long and dragged out but was pleasantly surprised. The sibling rivalry between Daniel Craig and Liev Schreiber was great and the overall context of the story really brings you in to the movie. The build up of the different philosophies between the two brothers and how they interweave at times was very well depicted. I think the best part of the movie was how they managed to turn the forest they were hiding in into one of the main characters.

I would strongly recommend that everyone check this movie out. Its not a must see by any means but is a high quality watch if you have the time.

Valkyrie

A proud military man, Colonel Claus von Stauffenberg is a loyal officer who serves his country all the while hoping that someone will find a way to stop Hitler before Europe and Germany are destroyed. Realizing that time is running out, he decides that he must take action himself and joins the German resistance. Armed with a cunning strategy to use Hitler’s own emergency plan – known as Operation Valkyrie – these men plot to assassinate the dictator and overthrow his Nazi government from the inside. With everything in place, with the future of the world, the fate of millions and the lives of his wife and children hanging in the balance, von Stauffenberg is thrust from being one of many who oppose Hitler to the one who must kill Hitler himself.

This wasn't necessarily a bad movie. Its actually pretty watchable. The problem is that I simply couldn't care less about what was going on in the movie. I wasn't in to it at all. I'm not really sure if that was me personally or if the direction of the movie fails as a whole to get viewers in to the movie. Its just sort of there. The other problem is that the movie was advertised as an action/espionage thriller. There was an action scene at the beginning of the movie and an explosion towards the end. That was it for the action. As for it being a "thriller" . . . . . can't remember a single moment that would validate that.

I wouldn't really recommend that anyone rush to check this out. You can pretty much wait for rental or cable on this bad boy.

The Ten Best Movies of 2008

10 - Traitor
This movie came out late summer and was quickly forgotten. However, this movie was the equivalent of a Bourne movie in terms of intensity, legit action and a solid, stoic peformance by Don Cheadle, one of the most underrated actors in Hollywood.

9 - Tropic Thunder
Easily the funniest movie of 2008. The core group of actors were all hysterical, especially Robert Downey Jr. However, what totally made this movie was Tom Cruise's role as movie producer Les Grossman. This was honestly one of the best career moves I've ever seen someone make.

8 - Kung Fu Panda
I have always had a huge soft spot for animated movies that the adults can enjoy as much as the kids. The fact that the main hero in this movie was a fatty only made me feel that much more attached to him with my fat ass. The voices were great, the laughs were huge and the movie was beyond entertaining.

7 - The Incredible Hulk
I know that people will think that this movie has no right being on a top 10 list, but The Hulk was always my favorite superhero growing up and this movie was everything that the original movie a couple years back should have been. This movie was tremendously entertaining and was a big part of one of the most satisfying movie going summers I can remember in a long time.

6 - Revolutionary Road
I never would have thought that such a plain movie could be so intense. Basically its like watching a disfunctional couple in the 50s fight/argue for two hours but you can't look away because of how all out real the fights are. WW and I were cracking up after it was over at how we were so emotionally drained from watching it.

5 - Gran Torino
This is probably my favorite Clint Eastwood film. His portrayal of an old school war veteran having to deal with ethnic changes in his town and the generation gap between him and his children/grandchildren was amazing. His totally out of left field, insensitive one liners also made this movie totally hysterical.

4 - Iron Man
Never in a million years did I expect this movie or the casting of Robert Downey Jr to be so brilliant. I honestly rolled my eyes when I heard they were making this an expected another Daredevil. I rolled my eyes again when I heard that they cast Downey Jr. and figured that the movie would be garbage. I was so beyond wrong and this movie ended up easily being one of the top 5 comic book movies ever made.

3 - Slumdog Millionaire
I had heard great things about this movie but figured that everyone was just creating that I saw this first type buzz. I totally expected this to be the movie this year that I ended up not liking as much because of the aforementioned buzz (that honor ended up going to The Wrestler for the record) but I was wrong. This is one of those movies that just takes you on a ride that you love every second of but can't for the life of you explain why. It was so well done with the back and forth story telling and based on my belief that my top two movies on this list will probably garner no attention whatsoever, this movie is my pick to win the Best Picture oscar for 2008.

2 - Wall-E
I absolutely loved this movie. I loved the love story portion of it even though they were robots. I loved how they mocked the human race's laziness by saying that in the future we are all going to be sitting on moving recliners with multiple screens attached to the chair and that our bone structure is going to change from our lack of mobility. Most of all, I loved the character of Wall-E. He might end up being one of my favorites of all time. The way that the animators were able to show curiousity, shock, sadness, and love in a robot without using any dialogue was absolutely priceless.

1 - The Dark Knight
This is not only the best movie of 2008 . . . . . it is hands down the best comic book movie of all time. Heath Ledger as The Joker is one of the greatest performances of all time. Christopher Nolan's directing and build up of tension to the big scenes in the movie was awesome. The script was so powerful that even after having seen the movie 20 - 30 times I'm still picking up on some of the reflections on society and am amazed at how dead on they are. This movie is so much more than just a comic book movie. Its one of the best movies of all time.

The 10 Worst Movies of 2008

10 - The Happening
M Night Shymalalalalalalalan struck gold with The Sixth Sense right out the gate and is pretty much screwed for life while trying to recapture that same gold. This movie was so bad that I found myself laughing as people were killing themselves.

9 - Soul Men
Samuel L. Jackson has become the worst actor in Hollywood. Its almost at the point where I don't want to see a movie he's in. It is such a shame that this piece of dung is the last thing that Bernie Mac will ever do.

8 - The Spirit
Not even the cool visual look of Frank Miller movies could help save this absolute piece of garbage. I made it a whole 19 minutes before pulling the plug. Side note - Samuel Jackson also in this. Seeing a trend?

7 - The Midnight Meat Train
Never heard of it? Consider yourself lucky. This stupid movie about a train that would go down a different tunnel and anyone on it would be brutally killed was horrendous!

6 - Harold & Kumar Escape From Guantanomo Bay
Even though I've never really been in to getting high, I can usually manage to enjoy pot movies anyway. Not the case with this one. I liked the first one but there was absolutely no reason for this sequel.

5 - You Don't Mess With The Zohan
I've always enjoyed Adam Sandler movies. I know that they are totally immature and sophmoric, but I tend to laugh my ass off anyway. This was the first one that I absolutely hated and ended up walking out on. I smiled once in the first hour before calling it a day.

4 - House
Never heard of it? Again - consider yourself lucky. This was another "horror" movie that was not scary whatsoever and was made so cheap that it would have been a lame made for Sci-Fi Network movie. I still can't for the life of me figure out why Michael Madsen was in this movie. Does he really not have any better options?

3 - College
Yet another envelope pushing sex comedy. I literally watched 8 minutes of this with a disgusted look on my face while waiting to string up another movie at work. It was more than enough to decide that I will never bother watching a single remaining second of the big turd.

2 - Fool's Gold
WW and I couldn't believe how horrible this movie was. In fact. I think we stayed as long as we did purely out of shock.

1 - Meet Dave
This movie was simply the worst movie of 2008. It is one of those epically horrible movies. Its one of those that are so bad that everyone must see it. This movie is on par with Howard The Duck, Leonard Part 6 and Ishtar bad. Eddie Murphy needs to tell his agent point blank that he can no longer even look at scripts like this anymore.