Machete

The feature version of the trailer from Grindhouse finds Machete (Trejo) a renegade former Mexican Federale, roaming the streets of Texas after a shakedown from drug lord Torrez (Steven Seagal). Reluctantly, Machete takes an offer from spin doctor Benz (Fahey) to assassinate McLaughlin (Robert De Niro) a corrupt Senator. Double crossed and on the run Machete braves the odds with the help of Luz (Michelle Rodriguez), a saucy taco slinger, Padre (Cheech Marin) his "holy" brother, and April (Lindsay Lohan) a socialite with a penchant for guns. All while being tracked by Sartana (Jessica Alba), a sexy ICE agent with a special interest in the blade slinger.

I must tell the truth and say that I turned this movie off after 33 minutes. It wasn't that it was the worst thing I've ever seen. I just figured I had too many things to do other than continue watching it. This is yet another of those it is what it is movie. Its a 70s exploitation movie with crazy over the top gore, lame writing/acting and a grainy feel to the film itself. Machete kills anyone that gets in his way . . . . . in the nastiest way possible. For example, I turned it off shortly after he gutted some guy and used his intestines as a rope to jump out of a window and go two floors down.

My recommendation for this movie solely depends on if you like these kinds of movies. If you do - you will laugh and have a great time watching it. If you don't (or you are too busy like I was) you shouldn't bother with it.