Dishonorable Mention - Ma
Had to include this for my best friend. But let's be honest - how in the blue hell are multiple academy award winners in a movie this basic/stupid? This was an ID channel movie.
10 - The Lighthouse
This is one of those movies that I never understand. Every critic raves about it artistically blah blah blah but I couldn't possibly find a single person that actually saw it and would say the same thing. The public had a universal what the hell is this reaction just like me.
9 - Black Christmas
Easily the most unscary movie of the year. I hate "horror" movies with no horror. There are always a couple of spots on my Bottom 10 that seem reserved for this.
8 - Charlie's Angels
One of two completely not needed and utterly craptastic reboots on this years list. Who wanted this? And if they did - your main star is Kristen Stewart!?! Would love to be have footage of the thought process for this one.
7 - Playmobil: The Movie
A massively lame attempt at cashing in on the pull of the Lego Movies. However, there was effort and humor put into those for kids and adults. This was just a horrible money grab for families this year.
6 - Child's Play
The second reboot to make the list. How in the blue hell do you make a movie about a killer doll 20 years later and make everything special effects about the doll actually look worse? This movie was just plain awful. Like I was getting annoyed watch it. And for the record - I loved the original Child's Play.
5 - Stuber
How in the blue hell is this an actual movie? This was like a slapstick, stupid 90 minute ad for Uber. Better question - HOW IN THE BLUE HELL WAS THIS A WIDE RELEASE IN THE SUMMER!?! If that doesn't speak volumes about how bad this year was for movies then I don't know what does.
4 - Serenity
Much like Ma - how do you have this cast and produce a movie this bad. This is actually a theme for this year as we still have another one for me to rant this same thing about. But this movie was a massive snoozefest with literally no suspense. I pretty much stared at my watch the whole time.
3 - Little
This is a very tired story from back in the 80s and 90s. Some were good (Vice Versa is still one of the funniest movies ever) but the story kind of ran itself into the ground. I thought that maybe this one would be decent since enough time had gone by. After not laughing once in the first 45 minutes I pulled the plug on this and left.
2 - Cats
I legit watched this movie with a WTF face on from beginning to end. What was the plan here? How in the blue hell did anyone think this was a good idea? Why have them all made into cats but keep their human hands? How did this cast and this director come together and actually spend months filming this and nobody questioned how NOT GOOD of an idea this was? Only one thing could prevent this from having a stranglehold on worst movie of the year . . . . . . . . .
1 - Midsommar
What in the actual f was this movie!?!?! How in the actual f is it showing up on a ton of top 10 movie list for critics!?!?! This movie was downright brutal. It was like 7 hours long. You kept hoping that it would get better but it never did. Not only that - but they just kept escalating the absurdity that my friend had to physically stop me from running out of the theater. This was beyond rough and will be a personal punchline for us for years.
Had to include this for my best friend. But let's be honest - how in the blue hell are multiple academy award winners in a movie this basic/stupid? This was an ID channel movie.
10 - The Lighthouse
This is one of those movies that I never understand. Every critic raves about it artistically blah blah blah but I couldn't possibly find a single person that actually saw it and would say the same thing. The public had a universal what the hell is this reaction just like me.
9 - Black Christmas
Easily the most unscary movie of the year. I hate "horror" movies with no horror. There are always a couple of spots on my Bottom 10 that seem reserved for this.
8 - Charlie's Angels
One of two completely not needed and utterly craptastic reboots on this years list. Who wanted this? And if they did - your main star is Kristen Stewart!?! Would love to be have footage of the thought process for this one.
7 - Playmobil: The Movie
A massively lame attempt at cashing in on the pull of the Lego Movies. However, there was effort and humor put into those for kids and adults. This was just a horrible money grab for families this year.
6 - Child's Play
The second reboot to make the list. How in the blue hell do you make a movie about a killer doll 20 years later and make everything special effects about the doll actually look worse? This movie was just plain awful. Like I was getting annoyed watch it. And for the record - I loved the original Child's Play.
5 - Stuber
How in the blue hell is this an actual movie? This was like a slapstick, stupid 90 minute ad for Uber. Better question - HOW IN THE BLUE HELL WAS THIS A WIDE RELEASE IN THE SUMMER!?! If that doesn't speak volumes about how bad this year was for movies then I don't know what does.
4 - Serenity
Much like Ma - how do you have this cast and produce a movie this bad. This is actually a theme for this year as we still have another one for me to rant this same thing about. But this movie was a massive snoozefest with literally no suspense. I pretty much stared at my watch the whole time.
3 - Little
This is a very tired story from back in the 80s and 90s. Some were good (Vice Versa is still one of the funniest movies ever) but the story kind of ran itself into the ground. I thought that maybe this one would be decent since enough time had gone by. After not laughing once in the first 45 minutes I pulled the plug on this and left.
2 - Cats
I legit watched this movie with a WTF face on from beginning to end. What was the plan here? How in the blue hell did anyone think this was a good idea? Why have them all made into cats but keep their human hands? How did this cast and this director come together and actually spend months filming this and nobody questioned how NOT GOOD of an idea this was? Only one thing could prevent this from having a stranglehold on worst movie of the year . . . . . . . . .
1 - Midsommar
What in the actual f was this movie!?!?! How in the actual f is it showing up on a ton of top 10 movie list for critics!?!?! This movie was downright brutal. It was like 7 hours long. You kept hoping that it would get better but it never did. Not only that - but they just kept escalating the absurdity that my friend had to physically stop me from running out of the theater. This was beyond rough and will be a personal punchline for us for years.
